Anonymous
Watching the news tonight I was unsure if I needed glasses or if every story was about accusations of criminal activity. Half of the time I was looking at photographs of people with their eyes pixelated and the other half I was watching video of people with blurred faces being arrested by other people wearing balaclavas. I'm confused by these conflicting strategies – television companies seem to believe that obscuring the eyes makes people impossible to identify, but the police protect their identities by obscuring their whole faces apart from their eyes.
Someone called Gromosława C. has been arrested for doing something I couldn't be bothered to understand. It was he whose face had been blurred or pixelated. I was struck by two things about this attempt to hide the identity of the accused. Firstly, exactly how many people are there in Poland called Gromosława? I'm betting there are probably about four, and that only one of them has a surname beginning with 'C.' Secondly, why are no precautions taken to obscure moustaches? Polish men of a certain age take great pride in cultivating luxurious moustaches and many are just, if not more, distinctive than the eyes of their owners. A quick look through the archives of www.moustache.pl is easily sufficient to make a fool of the law.
I understand the idea behind protecting the identity of individuals, accused and victims, involved in criminal cases. It's just a shame that it doesn't work… at all. It especially doesn't work when accused or victim is already famous. I have to wonder if whoever came up with this law had ever seen a television or a newspaper. It might have been more effective to require the entire population to close their eyes, put their fingers in their ears and go "BLAH, BLAH, BLAH" very loudly whenever the relevant name is mentioned.
The convention of shortening last names to just the first letter followed by a full stop seems particularly futile. What would happen if somebody truly famous became involved in a court case? What if the Pope and the queen of England were involved in a street brawl: "Pope Benedict X. accuses Queen Elizabeth I. of pulling a knife"? What happens when companies are taken to court? Do newspapers have to report: "Restaurant chain McD. accused of turning Polish kids into blobs of walking fat"? Does the law extend to international affairs? When Russia next 'intervenes' in a neighbouring state will television news have to show a map with the Urals pixelated to protect its identity?
Rest assured, the next time I am arrested for a major crime and you see a pixelated face identified as belonging to Jamie S. on your screens, I'll give a little wave just so you know it's really me.
