Virgo Poland, Sagittarius Russia?
Did you know that Poland is a Virgo? Just like people, countries can have star signs too. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised – us humans are endlessly fascinated by things like astrology and the people who make money from things like astrology will always think of ways to expand their product range. Somewhere out there on the Internet I’m sure there is a site that will predict the behaviour of your chickens depending on when they hatched.
How do we know Poland is a Virgo? According to The World Book of Horoscopes, the Polish Third Republic was born when: “Tadeus Mazowiecki became Prime Minister in Poland’s Solidarity dominated coalition government at a few minutes after 1 pm on 24 August 1989,” which makes it a Virgo (23 August – September 22). The same book claims that England was born at the coronation of William I on 25th December 1066 (Capricorn) and that the United Kingdom came into existence at midnight on January 1, 1801 (which makes us a double Capricorn).
If you are like me, you will believe that astrology is nonsense and simultaneously be completely unable to resist secretly reading your star sign predictions when you see them. How well does Poland fit the traditional characteristics of the Virgo? The top Virgo traits are supposed to be a love of tradition and a fierce strain of independence. So far it looks like a match. I’ve never been to a country more obsessed with the glories of the past than Poland and few nationalities guard their independence more vigorously than the Poles.
What about less positive characteristics? Virgos are predisposed to worrying and finding fault in everything. They are also inclined to make a huge fuss about small things and are archetypal hypochondriacs. I wouldn’t dare to judge how accurate these are, but I will say I’ve never seen so many pharmacies in my life. Virgos are supposed to make excellent nurses and doctors because of their caring nature (Mother Teresa was a Virgo) and are also very good at detailed technical tasks, which makes them good programmers (Polish programmers are recognised as among the best in the world), chess players and engineers.
How well does Poland get on with other nations? Modern Russia came into existence on 8th December 1991, which makes it a Sagittarius. Typing: “Sagittarius and Virgo love match” into Google led me to the following words of wisdom: “Initially, Virgo may find Sagittarius exciting. Virgos and Sagittarians enjoy each other’s company, and can make good friendships. However, these opposites may find too little common ground to progress beyond an initial flare of attraction into a love relationship.” Norman Davies would be proud of having written such a succinct summary of Russo-Polish relations.
The United States was born on 4th July, 1776 – a Cancer. Can Virgo and Cancer ever find happiness? “Living with critical Virgo will not be an easy task for the emotionally high strung Cancer, who will take all criticisms to heart and sulk for days. However, in spite of this, the chemistry is exceptionally good. The Virgo will be very into the Cancer, and the feeling will be mutual.” It’s true! Poland and the US love each other deeply and show it by arguing constantly.
Of course, there are other forms of astrology. According to the Chinese tradition, Poland was born in the year of the snake: “attractive people who take crises with ease and do not become flustered easily,” which is pretty much the opposite of Virgo. Clearly Poland needs to invent its own astrological tradition (suggested signs: the golonka, the gherkin and the beetroot) before we can arrive at the truth.
Jamie Stokes